What moves you?
I recently was coaching a client and she said that she established her goal for the year, however she didn’t feel motivated enough to do what was necessary in order to achieve it.
After a series of questions, she revealed that her situation, although somewhat painful, was not painful enough to motivate her into action. I shared this story that I had heard once that really explains how most people are living so I thought I would share it with you.
A man would take a walk every night after dinner. He would walk by this house and there was a man and his dog sitting on the farmer’s porch of their home.
Every night when the man walked by, he would hear the dog moaning and groaning. After several night of this, the man finally stopped and asked his neighbor why his dog was always moaning and groaning?
His neighbor replied, “It’s because he’s laying on a nail”. The man asked, why doesn’t he get off of the nail? His neighbor replied, “Because it doesn’t hurt bad enough”.
Is that you or do you know someone like that, always moaning and groaning about how he or she hates their job, hates their boss, hates where they’re living or isn’t happy with his or her relationship.
I worked with a guy that hated working at that job, but was there for over 30 years moaning and groaning! Don’t let that be you. Make a move before you look back and wish you did.
I share this story because so many people live their lives lying on a nail. The pain isn’t bad enough to move them towards something better.
There are two things that move you, pain and pleasure! If the pain isn’t bad enough, it is time to find something that will give you incredible pleasure. This is why setting goals that are somewhat of a fantasy is so important.
Your goal has to create so much pleasure as you visualize it that it begins to move you into action to achieve it!
Through a goal setting process, my coaching client created a picture of a goal that brought so much pleasure thinking about it, that her body has no choice but to move. It’s the image combined with emotion that causes us to move from where we are to where we want to be!
Decide on your fantasy, get emotionally involved in the idea and watch it manifest into your life!
Interesting that I´ve read this article precisely today….Interesting what it says about living in a little bit of pain and taking a radical shift trying to live in a lot of pleasure. I completely agree that just one of them is what makes us really move towards something different. But, I´m confused, even though I agree that fantasy is very,very important…How much our goals should have of fantasy? How much fantasizing (don´t misinterpret me-I love fantasy) makes us to stay there, because it is much more pleasurable?
It would be great be completely aware of the “nail” situation to move forward before the pain grows. What is that point that really causes us a reaction without being in a major pain or a pleasurables posibilites that we like to think that are gonna happen?
Why is so difficult sometimes react after having racionalized like “hey, this is not the ideal situation, move before it gets worse”? This point of reaction facinates me. How to turn it on and make it a regular resource?
Well, your article made me think!
Thank you
Hi Dolores,
I am glad that this post made you think and I appreciate the comments. We are moved by either pain or pleasure and I encourage people to create fantasies of what they want so that image in their mind is so pleasurable that it makes their body move towards realizing it. Most people can endure the pain of unhappiness for a very long time, some forever. This is why it is so important to gave goals that excite you.
Your question about the point in time that we finally decide tom act and move towards what we truly want and away from what we don’t want really depends on how badly you want your goal. Your goal MUST excite you and scare you at the same time. You must then ask yourself, “Am I willing to do what it takes to achieve this goal?” When you can answer this decisively with a “Yes”, the goal is on it’s way!
Hope this helps!
Phil